Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

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woody
Posts: 694
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:59 pm

Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by woody »

I was in a pub quiz the other day I lost by one point. The question was where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently, it's Africa




One of the other questions was to name two things commonly found in cells. It appears that Scousers and Pikeys is not the correct answer



I've heard that Apple have scrapped their plans for the new children's iPod after realising that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.



George Clooney is to star in a new film about Gary Glitter, called "Oh, She's Eleven."



My wife told me I was no longer romantic so I booked a table for the two of us on Valentine's Night. Problem was she's rubbish at snooker


There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in Bolton but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some bomber jackets




You can say lots of bad things about paedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools


A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache!"
'If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?
Billy Connolly
DiamondsFan
Posts: 665
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:20 pm

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by DiamondsFan »

Why have you put 'these' in capitals?
woody
Posts: 694
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:59 pm

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by woody »

DiamondsFan wrote:Why have you put 'these' in capitals?
What has it got to do with you? :lol: :lol: :lol:

You have missed recent events :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
'If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?
Billy Connolly
mattreddan
Posts: 955
Joined: Wed Dec 23, 2009 11:59 am

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by mattreddan »

"My wife told me I was no longer romantic so I booked a table for the two of us on Valentine's Night. Problem was she's rubbish at snooker"
and
"A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache!"
Made me laugh :lol:
woody
Posts: 694
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:59 pm

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by woody »

mattreddan wrote:
"My wife told me I was no longer romantic so I booked a table for the two of us on Valentine's Night. Problem was she's rubbish at snooker"
and
"A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache!"
Made me laugh :lol:
Me too.

Why do people always try to trip people up? :twisted: (not you)
'If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?
Billy Connolly
rudolph_hucker
Posts: 1750
Joined: Thu Dec 31, 2009 6:22 pm

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by rudolph_hucker »

Each one of those jokes is wrong and you're going straight to Hell mister. If I had the inclination I'd complain, but my life is already too full to worry about it ;).



















I bet you daren't post some of the ones I text you :D
You're knocked out with who I am,
Look at you now, you're all in my hands.
woody
Posts: 694
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:59 pm

Re: Lets see if THESE are acceptable?

Post by woody »

rudolph_hucker wrote:Each one of those jokes is wrong and you're going straight to Hell mister. If I had the inclination I'd complain, but my life is already too full to worry about it ;).
Now there's a challenge :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


















I bet you daren't post some of the ones I text you :D
'If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?
Billy Connolly
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